You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize