so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
