Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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