I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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