I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
