it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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