I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
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