Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
i out mim tonsoeep
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