Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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