Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Randomize
