that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Randomize
