Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
