I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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