So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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