They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Randomize
