Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
