Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
