I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
