Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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