rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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