Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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