you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
