Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
