So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
