watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize
