I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
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