I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
soo... how was my night?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
