Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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