I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Randomize
