if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
