you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
