Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
