PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
