he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Randomize
