I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
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