We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
