don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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