Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
