It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
