Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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