Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize