I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
