why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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