You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Randomize
