glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Randomize
