I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
