it was like eating out sand paper
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
