I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
