just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
