Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Porn is love you can see.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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