their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
