just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
